picking up the trash | some thoughts on voting this election

I can't help it, every time I'm out in nature, I pick up the trash.  A tiny candy wrapper here, a garbage bag left behind there.  I pick up the trash because I love the earth!  When I go to my river and see the piles of trash left behind by people who don't live here, I feel such ownership and even though I didn't leave it behind, I take the time to throw it away, because I want to come here for years and years to come.  

One day, I'll never forget, I was walking beside the ocean and bent down to pick up a small wrapper from the ground.  I put it in my pocket and thought nothing of it until someone who was passing by sneered at me and said " Do you really think you picking up that wrapper is going to make a difference?"

I was so stunned.  OF COURSE IT MAKES A DIFFERENCE!  Can't you see?!  There is one less wrapper on this beautiful beach.  Sure they'll be other wrappers and so I will keep picking them up.

I'm not politically minded.  I don't grasp or understand all the ins and outs of how things work in this inner circle, but I've tried to stretch myself to research and learn about the options I have to vote for.  

This year I'm voting for Gary Johnson (Libertarian Candidate) for president.  And just as when I picked up that small wrapper from the beach, I have been sneered at and told "Don't you know, your vote isn't going to make a difference." or even worse, "Don't know you that you are endangering our country by giving your vote to (fill in the blank)?!"  

Well, I refuse to make my vote based on fear.  I REFUSE!  I happen to believe that no matter what I vote or who wins, that we will be ok-ish.  

Yes.  Most likely Gary won't win the election by a landslide (thank you antiquated system and media monopoly), but maybe just maybe, enough people will step outside of what is comfortable and not be shamed or scared into their vote.  Every time I see a trusted, smart friend say they are voting for Gary Johnson, I feel just a little bit more like sticking it out.  Maybe we all just need to stop being bullied and stand up for ourselves and our wishes.  Maybe next election people will talk about how a third party candidate actually got pretty close and maybe next election more people will vote without fear.  

Because how will any progress ever be made?  How has any change or progress ever been made? It's been made by people who refuse to believe the lies that they don't matter.

Because I cannot, I will not be told that picking up a piece of trash doesn't matter and I will not be told that my vote doesn't matter.  Because believing that makes me apathetic and I loose a feeling of ownership and responsibility and I frankly don't really want to live in a world, in a country that makes me feel that way.

And so I will keep my head down and I will keep picking up the wrappers so that many years from now my children will be glad that I did.  

alison and david | charleston, sc

I grew up with a best cousin friend who was nearly exactly my age.  I had 4 younger sisters and she had 2 older brothers.  So going to each other's home was always new and exciting.  David is one of the older brothers.  He tormented me as a girl (folding me up in the folding couch and hiding under our bed) and I loved it.  

David is really special to me.  I've always loved his quiet and wild heart.  I spent endless summers watching him in the ocean mastering anything athletic he touched.  When I think of him, I see him coming in from the ocean with his twinkly eyes, giant smile and his salty hair.  

David has those same twinkly eyes for Alison.   

Really the first good amount of time I spent with his bride was the morning of her wedding.  I spent a few relaxing hours at their rental house with her family who flew from Scotland to celebrate.  And what a sweet morning it was!  Chatting and dancing and drinking tea and eating biscuits. As the hours ticked by my heart felt more and more glad that my dear cousin got to spend the rest of his life with this woman.  Not only is she kind but she is genuine through and through.  Not only is she strong (hello crossfit!) but she is gentle.  

Alison and David had their first look at his parent's home in Charleston, SC where the summer sun pierced through the draping spanish moss in the most romantic of ways.

They had their intimate ceremony on the water at Cottage on the Creek on Shem Creek.  During their ceremony they honored their parents beautifully and also honored David's daughter Jenna Kate with family vows.  

As soon as they were pronounced husband and wife the sky poured down with a torrential summer rainstorm!  Despite heavy rain, the party didn't even waver.  The cocktail hour was cozy and intimate and everywhere I looked there were smiles and laughter.    

Every wedding I do I look through my camera and document so many new faces.  Even though they are just faces to me, I know each one is beloved and treasured by the bride and groom.  It was really special to really know and love the people on the other side this go around; my great Aunt Lucy, who I named my daughter after, my cousin who I have 90% of my childhood memories with, and so many other loved ones.   

I entered the wedding day completely positive that the dance floor would be hopping that night. No shadow of a doubt.  And I wasn't disappointed.  The dance floor was opened after the bride and groom interrupted their traditional first dance with the Whip and Nay Nay and the fun just went up from there.  The whole evening was filled to the brim with laughter, good food, dance and so.much.fun.  I might have even done the worm at one point...

ceremony and reception : cottage on the creek

make up and hair: blushair

floral: my sweet aunt robin's garden

sometimes it hurts

sometimes it hurts when wiggly teeth come out

sometimes it hurts to nurse your sweaty baby and know it could be the last

sometimes it hurts to be so tired and weary that it feels like you can’t take another step

sometimes it hurts to look back weeks later and ache at the love

sometimes it hurts when you love your baby so much but can’t stop his tears

sometimes it hurts to watch him climb higher and higher without you

sometimes it hurts to not be able to be with your love because a million tiny things keep you busy-important things

sometimes it hurts to see your baby’s cautious steps and know that next year she’ll be sure footed

sometimes it hurts to see your child covered in dirt and happier than he has ever been

sometimes it hurts to watch everyone you love from a distance and know that tomorrow isn’t promised

sometimes it hurts to breathe because love fills your heart

sometimes it hurts to push through crying and whining and packing and so many other unpleasant things

but it always is worth it to be together

sometimes I think hurt must be love

that ache so deep for things to be frozen so you can drink in one more moment of that time in life

Fondly remembering this little trip we took in May to celebrate our 11 year anniversary.  It was the time that Lucy had an ear ache and Barclay’s tooth almost fell out.  It was a time of pausing-even if just for a day.  It was a time when my love for Noah had never been stronger and his beard had never been fuller.  It was a time when Sullivan dug for hours in dirt without saying a word.  It was a time when my body and soul was so weary that I just sat and watched from afar with tears falling.  

My family.  

My family.  

This day breathed life back into me.  Every day we adventure together does.